I don't really know how to start this conversation, but I really think that it's one that gay and bi men need to start having again. So I'll just tell you all about a few of my experiences from the past several months that I've been here in Indiana.
It is my impression, as a result of recent events from this past weekend and these past several months that I've been in Indiana, that men who have sex with men in this state are rather adverse to using condoms when appropriate. I've been rejected several times solely because I told men that I would not bareback with them. I've experienced a few guys trying to initiate barebacking with me, sometimes even after we've previously discussed it and I made my choice clear. These people's nonchalance and entitlement to have anal sex without condoms makes it clear to me that this is the way things work, at least for a significant number of men.
It's easy for gaystream media to condemn these people as idiots or sensationalize them as bug-chasers. But these specific men I met were neither. Among them there was a lawyer, an engineer, a certified public accountant, and a college student. And I didn't see any indication that these people had a death wish or wanted to infect me with a disease. One guy said "I don't have any diseases" (even though the CDC estimates that a quarter of people with HIV in the US don't know it) when I brought it up. I replied that I don't know that and he certainly doesn't know that I don't, and that was, well, the end of the conversation. Just walked away. And this was in 2007, not 1967.