Fannie Fierce

I'm... too sexy for my boyfriend!

Filed By Fannie Fierce | January 19, 2008 9:05 AM | comments

Filed in: Living
Tags: promiscuity

Dear Fannie,

I'm a bit of a pickle. I'm a second year in college and in my first monogomous relationship since coming out a year ago. But, I'm an attractive guy and when I go out I tendto get attention -- a little too much attention if you ask me. From time to time... well, if anyone was in my position it's just too hard sometimes with all the temptation. What can a guy do?

--Too Hot to Handle It

Hey Readers!

Fannie Fierce here. We, at The Bilerico Project, are proud to announce a special edition of Fiercely Fannie on video! This was the first time I have ever attempted anything like this, so please excuse the amateur nature of the vlog post. I hope y'all enjoy!

*a transcript of the video follows

Hey Readers,
Fannie Fierce here. In honor of the new year I give you AskFannie's very first video advice column. And without further ado, the question!

Dear Fannie,

I'm a bit of a pickle. I'm a second year in college and in my first monogomous relationship since coming out a year ago. But, I'm an attractive guy and when I go out I tendto get attention -- a little too much attention if you ask me. From time to time... well, if anyone was in my position it's just too hard sometimes with all the temptation. What can a guy do?

Sincerely,
Too Hot to Handle It

Dear Too Hot,

Here's what I hear, blah blah blah I'm gay, blah blah blah monogamous, blah blah blah I'm hot... PITY ME! It's so hard to be beautiful. I have three words for you Too Hot, you're right hand... or in my case, my left! Basically You're a little gay slut with a wandering eye. And there's nothing wrong with that. Gay men have been constructing entire lives on promiscuity for decades. You mention that you're new to your first monogamous relationship and are newly out. While I'm sure you're madly in love with your boyfriend, it sounds like your head up here [gestures to head on shoulders] and your head down there [gestures to groin] are in two different places.

Every gay goes through different phases when he or she... he first come out. There's the slut phase and the pride phase. In the Pride phase you're all idealistic, and "No! I won't be like those other queers and there's only one guy for me," with your white picket fence and 2.5 adopted children from Somalia, or something Brangelina like that. In the slut phase, the whole world is your big gay oyster and you're at a buffet! Pile on the crab legs!

People go through phases in different order. Some have the pride first and then the slut phase, or vice versa. And... it sounds like you're a big gay slut. If you're not in the right place psychologically for a relationship right now, that's fine. You just need to make that clear with your boyfriend. Tell him that you're newly out and you want to play the field a little bit. It's perfectly fine to diversify your stocks, just as long as your stockholder knows what your doing. (That doesn't make any sense, but roll with me)


Be a big ol' gay slut, safely. However long it takes for you to get all that gay promiscuity stuff out of your system. And hey, it might never happen and you just might be a big ol' gay slut... forever. Which would be fabulous!

++
fiercely,
fannie

Send your questions to fannie@bilerico.com
Read the rest of fannie's blog at belowthebelt.org!


Recent Entries Filed under Living:

Leave a comment

We want to know your opinion on this issue! While arguing about an opinion or idea is encouraged, personal attacks will not be tolerated. Please be respectful of others.

The editorial team will delete a comment that is off-topic, abusive, exceptionally incoherent, includes a slur or is soliciting and/or advertising. Repeated violations of the policy will result in revocation of your user account. Please keep in mind that this is our online home; ill-mannered house guests will be shown the door.


Fannie, I LOVE the new video format! Keep it coming! And HELL YES for slut pride! Can I get a woot, woot?

Thanks Serena!

I'm glad you like the vid format! Unfortunately I won't be able to keep it up in that format for a while now. So the column will return to its regularly scheduled print format in the near future. But... seeing how Kelly from the viral video "Shoes" friended me on Youtube... I'm becoming slowly more and more confident in that arena.

and you can absolutely get a woot woot!