Michele O'Mara

50 Ways to Keep Your Lover: # 29-30

Filed By Michele O'Mara | March 28, 2008 8:04 AM | comments

Filed in: Living
Tags: advice column, lesbian, relationship, tips

In my book, Love Tips and Trips for Gay and Lesbian Relationships, I have identified 50 Ways to Keep Your Lover. My post last Friday offered strategies 27-28, this week I am sharing strategies 29-30. Look for more strategies next Friday!

29. Create Fun. Don't wait for fun to find you. Think about fun things to do. This comes naturally when you are courting, but once you commit, you get a little lazy in the ol' fun department. You go to work, come home, eat dinner, watch TV or work some more, feed the dog and go to bed. No fun there. Create fun on a regular basis. Make a fun-list. Take turns trying new things from your list of fun.

30. Address all Conflicts. Conflicts that are not addressed do not go away. They fester and fester, going from frustration to anger to resentment. Trust me, given the choice, you would much rather deal with a frustration, than with anger, or with anger than resentment. Not dealing with conflicts is like not paying the balance on a 21% interest rate credit card. Not paying it won't make the balance go down, and in fact you will experience a higher debt next month, along with a late fee. Deal with conflict today.

Michele O'Mara, LCSW


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Not dealing with conflicts is like not paying the balance on a 21% interest rate credit card. Not paying it won't make the balance go down, and in fact you will experience a higher debt next month, along with a late fee.

I love this line. It'll stick in my head. Great description.

People do tend to procrastinate on the relationship problems....