Here's something from an ex-gay North Carolina pastor:
"Get up on your feet so I can knock you down again!" I stood horrified in the hall as my father yelled at my mother lying on the floor at his feet. Their fighting had awakened me in the night.
This is one of my earliest memories. I was 5 or 6 years old. I believe I subconsciously decided at that moment: "I will not be like that man!" Thus began my rejection of masculinity.
Oh, the pop psychology. John Grey of Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus fame has a play that's showing here in Paris, and I can't help but think about how
damaging annoying pseudo-psychological nonsense is.
Several decades have not erased another memory of a summer afternoon when I was playing alone on a hill beside my house, wanting to be held by a man. There were no erotic feelings, just a God-given desire for male intimacy and protection. I was no older than seven.
Rarely did I experience my father's approval and love. And my mother, who was desperately unhappy, openly expressed to me her disdain for my father and her disgust for sex.
Oh, that "distant father, mean mother" junk. Do these people actually study this phenomenon? Do they go out and survey people to see if it actually pertains to more than just them?
I'm sorry that this guy's father was abusive. I really am. But he's getting a big ol' "Fuck you" from me because my dad did just fine by me and Tim Wilkins doesn't need to go around saying that he didn't when he hasn't even met my dad.
He did produce this gem in his testimony:
Several years later I gave in to that same-sex attraction. We had gone to school together for years, and his approving smile fascinated me. For the first time in my life, I felt that another male really liked me. I quickly found that homosexuality provided excitement, but not fulfillment. My sporadic homosexual activity continued until my early 20s, when I decided that although I honestly did not know how to be heterosexual, I did know how to be obedient.
That describes how many boys I've been with?