There she goes again.
Elaine Donnelly, the ever-so-coiffed defense-department-damsel-in-distress, is having Sapphic visions of a Slip 'N Slide ride with openly lesbian Congresswoman Tammy Baldwin.
And of course, it has something to do with Tammy's mile-high adventure with a woman.
After Secretary of Defense Robert Gates, at the behest of San Fran sister Pelosi, granted Baldwin permission to take her partner on a military flight, our girl in Michigan got her hair net in a bundle. Ms. D. called the decision a "slippery slope" that "sets a disturbing precedent because it tends to suggest that marriage doesn't matter, [and that] marriage of people of same-sex or any such association should be treated as the equivalent of marriage."
"This is an incremental step forward for the gay rights agenda," Donnelly told One News Now. "These things are all interconnected. This radical social change doesn't always happen overnight with a court ruling. Sometimes it comes creeping along incrementally."
In fact, Elaine was so creeped out by the creeping incremental-ness of the 21st century that she missed a scheduled appearance on Blog Talk Radio, where she was surely set to preach the gospel of her most important commandment: "Never love thy neighbor as much as thy loves thyself." She was a no-show, and since I did not spot her at Washington's S/p/alon salon, (where the always fabulous Konstantin does my own 'do) one has to imagine she was huddled down in Michigan, thinking about Tammy and the missus.
But while our fair Lady of the Lesbos - and her straw-for-brains fans - lament the beating of scarecrows on Capitol Hill, she comes across more like the Cowardly Lion, relentlessly chanting "I do believe in spooks. I do believe in spooks. I do, I do, I do, I do believe in spooks." Because, after all, "Those who support the law banning homosexuals from the military, warns Donnelly, must be diligent in opposing the agenda of people like Congresswoman Baldwin."
Fortunately for the rest of us, however, Elaine is stuck waiting for her Aqua Net to come 'round the baggage claim carousel, while heroines like Congresswoman Baldwin insist on first-class treatment for LGBT people.
Meanwhile Elaine just slips . . . the poor thing has, alas, never learned to slide.