Well, I guess my partner is finally making an honest man out of me. We are hopping on the love train and getting married in California. 
We are to be wed on June 27, 2008. And I couldn't be happier.
Anthony and I already consider ourselves married. We have been together for six years and have a son. We have our civil union from Vermont, our domestic partnership in our county in Florida, and had a commitment ceremony with our families. We have more anniversaries than you could even imagine. Any excuse for gifts and jewelry, right?
So why bother going to California and getting married? Why do we feel the need to make it "official" or need a piece of paper to confirm what we know? To us, this is just icing on the cake...
We already had a vacation planned for San Francisco in June to celebrate one of our many anniversaries. So as soon as the verdict came down, Anthony set up an appointment to get our license, then popped the question (he was very sure of my answer, I suppose). After some tears of joy, a warm sense of happiness set in. We were doing this. Finally.
I think it is simply a validation of what we feel in our hearts. It won't make a difference for us in Florida but on some level, it's pretty powerful. We won't be domestic partners, or "civil unioned"- but married. Anthony will be my husband.
And no one can take that feeling away.
I'm a firm believer in everyone deciding what's right for them-marriage or not. Our actual reality won't change, but it's an important symbol. It may not be for everyone, but for us it means a lot.
I think the easiest way to describe why it matters to me is share the reaction I got from one of my gal pals. She is a firm believer that marriage is a horrible, patriarchal institution. She was excited for me but was asking why I needed to do it. I explained how much it meant to me and she kind of got it. We joked back and forth about what kind of dress I would wear. I said it didn't matter what I wore, to which she replied-
"But this time it's for real."
I couldn't have said it better myself.
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23 Comments
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Waymon and Anthony,
This is the nicest news I have heard on this blog in a very long time. I send my love an prayers to both of you. May you have a long an joyful MARRIAGE together. I love hearing that word in our community.
MonicaHelms | May 17, 2008 12:22 PM
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Thank you, Monica! Just reading those words has again brought tears to my eyes...
Waymon Hudson | May 17, 2008 12:25 PM
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Why are you doing this? Because you can, and because it is your right! So, where are you registered?
Robert Ganshorn | May 17, 2008 12:25 PM
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Congratulations Waymon! My best to you and Anthony! May you have plenty of anniversaries together.
Bil Browning | May 17, 2008 12:26 PM
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Thanks for the congrats, guys!
I'll have to post later about where we register... LOL.
Waymon Hudson | May 17, 2008 12:49 PM
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...This stays here (or else...*deathglare*):
Awww, you two are one cute set; let's not mention the adorable children you're carrying.
Anyways, that's as effusive you'll see me in your lifetime. I wish you a happy, OFFICIAL marriage.
Lucrece | May 17, 2008 1:11 PM
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Lucrece-
You are such a big softie. I always knew it. :)
And our puppies steal every shot they are in... LOL.
Thanks for the well wishes!
Waymon Hudson | May 17, 2008 1:17 PM
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Congratulations!
Polar | May 17, 2008 1:47 PM
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Congratulations on your upcoming marriage, Waymon and Anthony!!! May you have many, many years of wedded bliss!
Dianne | May 17, 2008 2:04 PM
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Thanks Dianne and Polar!
Waymon Hudson | May 17, 2008 3:01 PM
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Congratulations to the now happier couple.
California is going to make a mint off this decisiion.
Bill Perdue | May 17, 2008 7:50 PM
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I have to ask... Are you in an RV? If so, you could always use this as your wedding march.
Bil Browning | May 18, 2008 1:11 AM
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Too cute!
Alex Blaze | May 18, 2008 6:43 AM
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LMAO, Bil-
Anthony's parents are retired and come down to Florida in an RV for part of the year. Good eye.
And thanks to all for amazing support! The more this settles in, the more it means. I'll be sure to report back to the Project about the big day!
Waymon Hudson | May 18, 2008 9:09 AM
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Congratulation, Waymon and Anthony. I wish you all the best, and hope that there will come a day when this will mean something in Florida, Wisconsin, Texas, Washington, and all of rest of the 40-some states that need to catch up to MA and CA.
marc | May 18, 2008 9:10 AM
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I suppose in the wonderful and flexible LGBT world, does this announcement mean we can throw you both a bachelor party AND a bridal shower? This could be fun.
MonicaHelms | May 18, 2008 9:15 AM
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Monica-
I can practically see you sitting there rubbing your hands together as you begin to plot/party plan...
This could be VERY fun... :)
Waymon Hudson | May 18, 2008 9:28 AM
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Congratulations Waymon and Anthony! I wish you two all the best.
Lena Dahlstrom | May 18, 2008 12:12 PM
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Thanks Lena!
Waymon Hudson | May 18, 2008 12:16 PM
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Congratulations Waymon and Anthony! Wonderful news!
zythyra | May 18, 2008 5:04 PM
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Thanks Zythyra! :)
Waymon Hudson | May 19, 2008 9:55 AM
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So I'm your "galpal" now, huh? Does that mean we can go on Top Chef together?
I'm really happy for you and Anthony and totally bummed that I can't make it to the wedding. I was so looking forward to wearing a leather harness and dog collar!
Serena Freewomyn | June 16, 2008 3:15 PM
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You'll be with us in spirit. And I'm sure we can find someone on Pride weekend in San Fran that is wearing a leather harness and collar to fill in for you. :)
Waymon Hudson | June 16, 2008 3:21 PM
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