Nan Hunter

Tying up those loose ends from 2008

Filed By Nan Hunter | January 02, 2009 10:00 AM | comments

Filed in: Marriage Equality, Politics
Tags: Al Franken, Dick Cheney, Elizabeth Dewards, George W. Bush, Harvey Firestein, lists, loose ends from 2008, Oprah, politics, Rick Warren, Tina Fey, Whoopi Goldberg

2008 was an incredible political year, mostly because the guy who everyone thought was placing his mark for a future presidential race ended up winning the big prize himself. Oh yes, and he's African-American. And he carried North Carolina, Virginia and Indiana.

On the other hand, there was this ditch called Prop 8 that the lgbt marriage equality movement stumbled into. Oh yes, and we may be in a depression to rival the ones our parents and grandparents talk about. And we're still mired in - count 'em - two wars.

So for better or worse, let's wrap this sucker up. Herewith my modest proposals for tying up the loose political ends of 2008:

Appoint Tina Fey the new senator from New York.

She's at least as funny and smart as Al Franken, and while she didn't compete in any electoral races this fall, she probably had as much impact on the big one as anyone in the country.

As for that Illinois seat, let Oprah decide.

Billionaires always get to decide these things, and she's certainly my favorite billionaire. Maybe she'll pick Dr. "it's time to get real" "no dog ever peed on a moving car" Phil. I can see it now: Dr. Phil and Al Franken quiz potential Supreme Court nominees. Sweet.

Establish the Bush-Cheney Truth and Reconciliation Commission.

Although prosecution is justified, it will never happen in the US and will produce only a nativist backlash if it happens in an international tribunal. This is an American mess that Americans ought to clean up.

Appoint Elizabeth Edwards ambassador to Tahiti.

If anyone deserves a warm, cushy job, she does. And the family needs it, since John may be the only Democratic also-ran who doesn't get a job in the Obama administration. Silda Wall Spitzer can be her deputy.

What to do with Rick Warren?

Get him a TV talk show... with Whoopi Goldberg as co-host. Book lots of interesting guests. Whatever happened to Harvey Fierstein? I almost never watch television, but I'd watch that.


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Great post, Nan. I particularly like the idea of Al Franken and Dr. Phil debating potential Supreme Court nominees. Oprah is more trusted than Gov B - why not try it? :)

The new Senator from IL has to be an IL resident. Dr. Phil lives in Texas. Dr. Phil is also violently and consistantly antitrans, and has a record of past spousal abuse (according to his exes), so let's not suggest his promotion.

One word: humor

Thanks Nan! I'd particularly enjoy watching Harvey Fierstein mop up the floor w/ Rick Warren. :)

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While arguing about an opinion or idea is encouraged, personal attacks will not be tolerated. Please be respectful of others.

The editorial team will delete a comment that is off-topic, abusive, exceptionally incoherent, includes a slur or is soliciting and/or advertising. Repeated violations of the policy will result in revocation of your user account. Please keep in mind that this is our online home; ill-mannered house guests will be shown the door.