Gina de Vries

We don't like Conserved Lesbians here on Ocean Avenue. Or Cereal Rapists!

Filed By Gina de Vries | March 22, 2009 5:30 PM | comments

Filed in: Entertainment
Tags: WTF

Perusing CraigsList for fun (and to voyeuristically ogle apartments I could never afford in a million years), I clicked on this posting. My curiosity was piqued because it was listed in the Ingleside, the San Francisco neighborhood where I grew up. The Ingleside is cheap compared to other SF neighborhoods, but I was still surprised by the $150 price tag for the room.

Then, I saw why:

conserved lesbian cereal rapist

This is almost too easy to make fun of!

The original link is here on Craigslist.


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Aidan Tharp Aidan Tharp | March 22, 2009 6:19 PM

this one is better: click here

OMG Aidan, that's f--king hilarious. I love #10 the best. :)

Don't know about you but I wouldn't be comfortable w/this bunch. What the f**k is a "conserved" lesbian?

Conserved: 1. Preserved, set aside, saved
2. redneck spelling of conservative

Notify Cap'n Crunch!!

Of course what they meant by conserved lesbian is a woman who wouldn't put out. Cereal rapist is a gay man who is not discrete about wanting the other housemates to put out.

You mean they'd have a problem with someone taking advantage of King Vitaman, or Captain Crunch?

A. J. Lopp | March 23, 2009 2:29 PM

I've never known a cereal rapist ... but I've heard that Count Chocula loves to go down (can't rape the willing, right?) ...

... and I was told long ago about the guys that worked at some KFC here in Indianapolis who would sometimes, at the end of the night shift, take the leftover biscuit dough, knead it into an appropriately (or inappropriately) shaped ball, butter it and then f*** it.

Don't worry, that was decades ago ... having learned how to screw everything in sight and get away with it, those guys are now probably CEO's at brokerage firms on Wall Street.

I don't know about the cereal rapists or conserved lesbians, but... MOPEDS! Any group of chill dudes interested in mopeds have got to be worth living with.