Friend of the blog Meghan Stabler sent me a copy of an e-mail an old co-worker sent her recently. Meghan transitioned while they worked together and the letter will bring a tear to your eye.
Her former co-worker asks Meghan a question in his post script. Meghan sent it along so we could find out how Projectors would answer him.
The e-mail is after the jump. The floor is yours.
No reason for you to remember me, but I was a DSM rep in J----'s org for a few years. I think we only met once or twice in group settings.
Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that as someone who was raised Catholic and is currently raising children in the Catholic Church...and also someone who has voted Republican in every election since becoming eligible to vote....that I really, really admire and respect you. More than that...you sort of opened my eyes to something I was seeing but not at all getting- hopefully that will make a little more sense when I'm done.
So...I was never AGAINST equal rights for the LGBT community (and I recognize that this is not the norm for Catholic Republicans)...but I wasn't necessarily for it either. I was more or less neutral. I had (still do) gay and lesbian friends that I really care about...but I never really saw them struggle with it. Anyway...I was still more or less neutral while I was at BMC and I heard about you - when you were still M-----, although I suppose you've always been Meghan, right? ;-) Anyway...my first thought was something like, "How is this person going to go through this in such a public way, for all to see, working for a company that from my perspective felt like an ole boys club?"
Okay..so long story short (yer gonna see that this is most likely an outright lie as I can't tell a short story)..I was extremely impressed by how courageous you were/are to make that kind of change for all the world to see. Anyway...I'm still not off my neutral post yet but close. So then someone emailed out a youtube video of you speaking at a conference and this was after your transition to Meghan. The person wasn't necessarily disparaging you, at least not outright...but it was sort of a "Hey, check this out" kind of thing and you could tell they thought it was funny. So I see the video and honestly my gut reaction was WOW...she is the bravest person I have ever personally encountered. Important to note that I thought of you as 'She' at that moment. And at the same time I was disgusted at the tone of the email I had just received and it was the first time I had really felt like I witnessed someone being discriminatory.
So..still not off the neutral post but getting closer. My wife and I were watching a special on Martin Luther King and they were showing Rosa Parks and some of the marches. One of the storylines was about the white people that walked arm in arm with the black people in one of the marches. Its a powerful image and I said to my wife that if I had lived during that time, that I hope I would have been one of those brave few to get involved... and all of a sudden it was like a switch flipped. I had never made the parallel before but once I saw it, I couldn't UNSEE it. I know unsee isn't a word but I had to use it anyway. I realized that neutral was just as bad, if not worse than being against it. Being neutral was being lazy and apathetic to the injustice of it all. It shouldn't be a question of 'Am I being impacted'...it's a question of 'Is ANYONE being impacted'....and once I started thinking in those terms, it just gets clearer and clearer. And then I thought about my gay friends and realize I haven't really been walking arm in arm with them...which triggers deep feelings of guilt...especially since on of those friends passed away a few years ago. He was a good friend to me and I thought I was a good friend to him as well...but now I'm not so sure.
Anyway...I've been reading your posts on FB and educating myself on the issues (I'm no expert..but I see now how little I understood about the issues and what's at stake). I have even recently re-posted some of your notes on my FB page - which I'm sure is a shock to many of my friends. Nobody has asked me about it yet but I'm waiting and hoping they will because I want to start the conversation and hopefully bring them around. It seems like such common sense now that I wonder how I never got it before.
In closing...I sincerely hope that I haven't offended you in any way. I truly just wanted to tell you that I respect you tremendously and I think what you are doing is amazing.
ps - I would like to do something...take some kind of action...any suggestions? I know I'm being a little naive...but I really do want to get involved...
What are your suggestions for ways S can "do something" to get involved?