"This year I am thankful to have you as my family rather than a normal American family. I say that because Sarah Palin is fond of talking about her family being a normal American family. Last time I checked everyone in my family knows where Africa is on a globe. Everyone goes to college after high school. We've had no teen pregnancies as of yet and no one has appeared in Playgirl. If the Palins are a normal, American family, I guess my bunch of anti-American socialists are fine by me."
-- From Helen Philpot's annual Thanksgiving letter to family members