Rumors about former President George W. Bush's sexuality were confirmed today when he announced that he is indeed gay, "Ladies and Gentlemen, I feel relieved to announce that I am a very fortunate homosexual man."
The former President was inspired by Ricky Martin's coming out earlier this week. "I'm a big fan," the President told reporters, "I thought if Ricky can do it, so I can I."
Asked if he regretted his attempt to restrict marriage to one man and one woman with a Federal Constitutional Amendment Bush said, "I do. I was pressured by people who knew about my encounters with a certain blogger. They said if I didn't push for the Amendment they would out me."