Bil Browning

Man Sees the Apocalypse in Miracle Whip Commercial

Filed By Bil Browning | June 10, 2014 3:00 PM | comments

Filed in: Fundie Watch, Living
Tags: Armageddon, End Times, Miracle Whip, Third Eagle of the Apocalypse

"The Third Eagle of the Apocalypse" is a batshit crazy man who considers himself a prophet ordained by Jeebus. The guy is obviously off his rocker, but sometimes his videos are amusing in the same way monkeys throwing shit makes kids giggle at the zoo.

This time, however, the "Co-Prophet of the End Times" has outdone himself. (As a side note, I've always wondered if his nickname comes from those bumper stickers that say "Jesus is my co-pilot.") What could possibly have our protagonist up in arms this time? A Miracle Whip commercial that obviously is an allegory for Satan, the anti-Christ, and the fall of the church. Because Jeebus.

All you have to do is count the number of deviled eggs the woman makes, divide by two, subtract a dozen, turn it into a fraction and then turn that into the Devil's phone number. Don't forget, the woman's name almost spells Satan if you rearrange the letters and drop a few plus she "looks like a transvestite" witch. Oh, yeah. It just keeps getting better the longer you watch.

(Hat tip to Joe.My.God. who regularly features the crackpot's entertaining videos.)


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