Storm Bear

An Open Blog Post To John McCain

Filed By Storm Bear | July 21, 2008 5:15 PM | comments

Filed in: Politics
Tags: eBay, gay cartoons and comics, humorous blog post, John McCain, linux, paypal, sco, technology, webcomics

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For someone who wants to lead one of the largest economies on the planet in the 21st century, you sure don't seem to understand the issues important to America.

Let's start with your computer illiteracy. It is so great that you have a tutor now and learning how to "work the Google" and we all look forward to the day when you can use the word Google correctly in a sentence. Soon, you will be able to get your email at "The Hotmail" and you will really love it when you can pour all your rage into "The Vista" when you reach the Blue Screen Of Death. Don't know what the Blue Screen Of Death is? Give it time, you will.

The computer revolution started in the late 70's with the creation of the Apple II thirty years ago. That is thirty years of American and global economic progress that you have no clue about. Some old economy stalwarts are all concerned about the fate of General Motors. This is a company that has produced shoddy products that haven't been appealing to Americans in some time. This is a company that is run by a guy who thinks global climate change is a myth. With that kind of intellectual ineptitude, I really could care less about the fate of GM, it could close for all I care. That at least would make way for a smarter car company to evolve - one that would actually be good for America.

Senator, you worry about the failure of GM because you are technology illiterate, what you should be more concerned about is the failure of Yahoo. If you were technology literate, you would have been very concerned about the outcome of SCO vs Novell - if that case had been found in favor of SCO, it would unleash a cluster fuck of network problems that you would have been woefully prepared to handle.

How will your administration deal with open source initiatives? Because of your illiteracy, would you stand beside your big money lobbyists and enact legislation that would be unfavorable towards open source projects?

How about PayPal? Do you consider it a bank? Do you know what PayPal is? What is your philosophy of secondary economies like auctioning off used belongings on eBay? Should that be taxed? Do you know PayPal is owned by eBay?

Don't you think it is unreasonable for the United States to keep laptops of Americans returning to the US from abroad? Don't you think imaging the hard drives is a violation of our civil rights? And Senator, don't give me the terrorist crap. Did you know, once you pass through customs, you can just download the "terror" files from a remote server when you sit down at the wi-fi enabled Starbucks inside the airport's concourse?

Yes you can get advisers to tell you all of this, but I am not electing them and even if I did trust them, you do not have the faculties to discern what is important and what it is not. It is nothing but a stream of three letter acronyms to you.

You don't even know enough to talk about birth control so how in the world are you going to be able to make complicated decisions?

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