Alex Blaze


Filed By Alex Blaze | March 13, 2009 10:00 AM | comments

Filed in: Fundie Watch, Marriage Equality, Media, Politics
Tags: America, Fox News, Glenn Beck, join or die, revolutionary war, unite or die, united states of america, us

I'm sure this item will earn a footnote in a book put together 80 years from now on the rise of fascism in America in the early 21st century (hopefully that book will never have to be written). Conservative entertainer Glenn Beck wants everyone to take part in Fox News viewing parties (5 pm Eastern today, so patriotic Real Americans in other time zones will just have to cut out early for the weekend) under the theme "We surround them!"

I don't know if "We surround them!" is meant as a the cry from a band of thugs that they about to beat the shit out of everyone else, or as an echo to Nixon's anti-democratic call upon the "silent majority." Because whether Beck wants to marginalize the real majority that spoke last November or pretend like he can intimidate them, it's supposed to remind his supporters of their sense of entitlement over the country.

021009unite1.jpgInterestingly enough, Beck even went to the trouble to create a logo, or more just steal and modify one Benjamin Franklin created (I'm sure Franklin would love to see how the great experiment in democracy turned out). In the context of the Revolutionary War, "UNITE, or DIE" (is changing it from "JOIN" to "UNITE" a mistake on the part of a Fox News producer or is it a message?) might have been an appropriate message. In the context of conservatives saying that Obama winning the election means you will die, or any policy that includes a hint of liberalism means you will die, I wouldn't be surprised if it drove some people to violence.

If you're wondering what's up with the messed up numbering, it's because Beck wants conservatives to rally around nine principles and twelve values. Here are the nine principles:

The Nine Principles

1. America is good.

2. I believe in God and He is the Center of my Life.

3. I must always try to be a more honest person than I was yesterday.

4. The family is sacred. My spouse and I are the ultimate authority, not the government.

5. If you break the law you pay the penalty. Justice is blind and no one is above it.

6. I have a right to life, liberty and pursuit of happiness, but there is no guarantee of equal results.

7. I work hard for what I have and I will share it with who I want to. Government cannot force me to be charitable.

8. It is not un-American for me to disagree with authority or to share my personal opinion.

9. The government works for me. I do not answer to them, they answer to me.

I might be more impressed with #3 if conservative pundits had a better record with honesty, or pretended like honesty mattered at all. I might think that Beck was onto something if #4 led to his unwavering support for both same-sex marriage and "beyond-marriage" legislation. I'd also love to see these folks, in support of #5, calling for investigations and prosecutions in Bush Administration's war crimes. And, if he really believed in #8, I'm sure he was defending people who opposed the War in Iraq from accusations of unpatriotism back in 2003.

As it stands, though, it's resembles a marketing ploy more than a political philosophy. But, then, there are folks who don't see this as entertainment but as truth, which is what makes it scary.

They're scared because America's economy is swirling in the toilet and because they've been told for eight years that terrorists are out to kill them, for two decades that totalitarian states were trying to attack the US, and for the better part of a century that Communism was a threat to their lives and livelihoods. Things actually are getting worse, materially worse, and there's a big part of the American population looking for a way to blame their problems on a malevolent authority.

They're also scared because there's a whole noise machine out there telling them that Keynesian economics won't help the economy - rather, our economic problems stem from government spending too much money, our immorality, and people just not loving America hard enough. So any real attempt to help the economy is another cause for anxiety for these folks.

And there are people like Beck and Fox News who are all too willing to use that fear to their own advantage. There's nothing revolutionary about what they're calling for - lower taxes and deregulation of industry - but they're using Revolutionary imagery because it's one of the few times in history Real Americans used violence and guns to shirk off a distant authority that wanted to tax them that's taught as a good thing.

Oh, and for humor value only, here are the 12 values Bush-supporter Glenn Beck wants Real Americans to stand up for:

Hard Work
Personal Responsibility

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And here I was thinking the Twelve Values would be the Boy Scout Law. Silly me.

Obviously, Glenn Beck drew up these Principles in a hurry. His wording is very incomplete:

  • On Principle #1, he left off "even when we torture, invade countries that don't substantially threaten us, lead the world in destroying the eco-system, and ignore our own Constitution."
  • On Principle #2 he left off, ", and following the First Amendment to the letter is the work of the Devil."
  • Principle #3, he left off, "unless my political opponent is ahead in the polls."
  • Principle #4, obviously, he left off, "as long as our marriage is legally recognized, is between one man and one woman, is traditional in every other respect, and she's not fucking around regardless of whether I do or not."
  • ... "unless you are a Republican President."
  • ... "especially when I am rich enough to afford a small army of Washington lobbyists."
  • ... "and that jerk in the Bible named Jesus has no right to teach me anything about what real charity is."
  • ... "unless the disagreement is with a Republican president --- only a commie pinko would do that!"
  • ... "and my belief in this principle is the main reason that I will soon be Bernie Madoff's cellmate, just as soon as my taxes get audited."

Why do we need a new rallying cry? ... I thought "Glenn Beck, Kiss My Progressive Caboose!" was working so well!

Bill Perdue Bill Perdue | March 13, 2009 6:42 PM

How dare this scumwad misappropriate a perfectly good revolutionary flag? He wants to turn it into a reactionary rag but people died defending what it really stands for, which is the right of people to eliminate the tyranny of the rich.

Then it was King George and the powdered wig set. This time it's Wal-Mart, GM, BoA, Chevron-Texaco, Haliburton and rest of the usual suspects. They looted the economy and destroyed our standard of living. They’re traitors to the struggle of colonialists who fought under the rattlesnake jack.

unn..on number two...Beck is a Mormon, which means that His "God" thinks it is cool to massacre wagon trains of Gentiles, to beat and to burn non-Mormons off of their lands, that Blacks will be slaves in Heaven, that you have to wear magick fruit of the looms....that Native Americans who did not give Mormons their lands were decendants of a murderous offshoot of an anciet tribe of Israel and deserced extermination... that interracial children and the parents who produced them were an abomination and needed destroyed.

And his church was not that happy with a husband and wife being the ultimate authority when their decisions conflicted with Mormon ambitions in Utah...

As far as the flag, his crowd already uses a flag, the Confederate Naval Jack (Amazing the number of rednecks I see with pick up trucks indicating that they are in the CSA Navy)

Ho hum.. Ppor babies still don't wanna admit that conservatism and communism morphed years ago.

If conservatism is so superior to liberalism, why all the deception and lies to sell it?

Bill Perdue Bill Perdue | March 16, 2009 2:26 PM

Conservatism and liberalism are two sides of the same coin. Socialism is the only legal tender for the kind of fundamental social repair we need.

The deceptions are from those who deny the interchangeability of conservatism and liberalism, Democrat and Republican, Bush and Obama.

Amanda Hatch | October 6, 2009 3:53 PM

it is difficult to affectively attack a liar with lies...I know more than one mormon, I have studied mormonisim, and I am fairly certain that many of your assertions are flawed. Check your facts and condemn people with the truth!