Jeff Lutes

Having the Sex Talk with Children

Filed By Jeff Lutes | May 03, 2011 3:30 PM | comments

Filed in: Living
Tags: birds and the bees, child care, parents, sex, sex ed

Healthy, age-appropriate, and sex-positive conversations with our children about the birds and the bees, sex-ed-2008.jpgor the birds and the birds, or the bees and the bees, or the "birds and either a bee or bird... are challenging for most parents, regardless of family composition.

Since the parental anxiety associated with such conversations is nearly universal, I thought I'd share a speech by former Saturday Night Live comic, Julia Sweeney. In this video, Julia discusses the sex education talk she had one evening with her eight-year-old daughter. The video has been on the internet for a year now, but it is well worth eleven minutes of your time if you haven't already seen it. While most of this mother-daughter conversation is about heterosexual sex, there are hilarious references to same-sex couples as well.

Every person who is a parent, and even most who are not, will be able to relate to the awkward emotions such parent-child moments can produce. So make yourself comfortable, turn up your computer speakers, get ready to split a gut laughing, and share your thoughts with the Bilerico community once you've regained your composure. Enjoy!

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"'Yes,' I said, lowering my voice and looking around conspiratorially, 'I KNOW. It's WEIRD.'" LMAO

There are worse ways to learn about internet porn.

This talk is coming up for me (my daughter is 6), so would love to hear some pointers about explaining lesbian sex.

That was rich! I have five kids and I always thought of it as broken down into three areas. First area is care feeding and personal hygiene which while it may seem not that related it does include a what to expect to see happen sometimes section and makes it so that in the future section two is less awkward. Section two is more about the biology of what happens, and in my house does include the idea of same sex couples. This really also include a talk about birth control and I also use a few classic illustrations from the Kama Sutra because it is so beautiful and artistic and this really is the idea that I want my kids to have about sex. Section three is about how sexuality is integrated into a relationship as part of a health life, and it usually comes later and includes some technical ideas and instruction on some practical how tos with another person and again a bit more of the Kama Sutra.