Alex Blaze

Masturbation Is the New Gay

Filed By Alex Blaze | October 17, 2011 5:00 PM | comments

Filed in: Fundie Watch, Living
Tags: Christian beliefs, LGBT, Mark Driscoll, masturbation, pastor, religious right

The funny thing is that this guy would have been taken seriously if he had said this just seven years ago. man-masturbating.jpgThe times, they are a changin':

"Masturbation can be a form of homosexuality because it is a sexual act that does not involve a woman. If a man were to masturbate while engaged in other forms of sexual intimacy with his wife then he would not be doing so in a homosexual way. However, any man who does so without his wife in the room is bordering on homosexuality activity, particularly if he's watching himself in a mirror and being turned on by his own male body."

- Pastor Mark Driscoll of Seattle's Mars Hill Church, from Porn-Again Christian: A Frank Discussion on Pornography & Masturbation for God's Men

There's a whole lot of fun in that statement, like the idea that only men masturbate (sorry, Mark, but women are able to experience sexual pleasure without you around) and the implication that he likes to look at himself in the mirror when he masturbates, not that there's anything wrong with that.

Masturbation has to be one of the least offensive things I've heard homosexuality compared to by a fundamentalist, so there's that. I'm more worried about the people who listen to Driscoll and others like him, who learn to hate something that they're probably going to do anyway and hate it because they think it makes them like us.

(imgsrc: image has been modified - link is NSFW)

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Maybe someone should point out to him that masturbating in front of his wife is still a deadly sin. There's no room for jacking off in God's eyes. You can't waste that stuff. You think it just grows on trees?

Genesis 38:9-10 ESV

But Onan knew that the offspring would not be his. So whenever he went in to his brother's wife he would waste the semen on the ground, so as not to give offspring to his brother. And what he did was wicked in the sight of the Lord, and he put him to death also.

good point.

I was wondering what pic you'd use to illustrate this that would keep bilerico SFW. You sure do love a dude with tats, bil.

True. Although I'll point out I went for the non-stereotypical "hot guy jacking off" photo. I had to crop it to keep it SFW; he was the only one I could find that I could crop and still "know" what he was doing.

While this verse is the theological basis for the idea that "every sperm is sacred", that's not a universal or even dominant interpretation among Christians. The dominant interpretation is that Oman's sin was willful refusal to have children "for" his late brother as per Jewish law, not masturbation.

Am I the only one who flashed to "Every Sperm Is Sacred" when I read the article?

"(sorry, Mark, but women are able to experience sexual pleasure without you around)"

I'd bet they're far less likely to when he IS around.

The entire tradition of Judeo-Christian Puritanism is fucked up from the word "Go!" And to think that they had to work literally for centuries to get this fucked up.

Cultures passing this type of idiocy from one generation to another is just amazing. Also incredibly sad and disappointing, but amazing.

This rings of someone who knows from experience. It seems he's speaking to his own subsumed desire when he goes into this kind of detail.

I'm not being catty, I honestly think that someone who seems concerned with desire tends to be someone who is drawn to that particular desire especially when they being to mention specific acts or go so far as to mention thoughts behind acts.

Perhaps in a bit there will be a gay sex scandal with his name on it.